What no one talks about:


Goodbyes. They're hard. Especially since I'm not good at goodbyes. I have the mentality that goodbyes can be permanent (and ESPECIALLY after your travel insurance company tells you that you have enough coverage to ship your body back if you die...).

I keep crying. I knew this would happen, but I cannot control it. I'm scared, I'm excited and I'm worried. What if something happens to me, or God forbid someone I love? I've never been a couple hours away from family for longer than two weeks. This whole independence thing is scary. Also would like to mention I do live on my own, but again I've always been a drive away from my sisters or Mom. I don't understand how those who have never moved out can do it.

I'm not someone who has day to day anxiety, but packing makes me SO anxious. I basically need someone with me, otherwise I just either procrastinate or end in a pool of tears.

Don't get me wrong, I am so excited. This has been a dream of mine for 13 years! I know I will make incredible friends, memories, and gain great experience. But I am also missing a year of my nephews life, my graduation ceremony, and many holidays. I know I cannot be complaining, because I am the luckiest person ever to have this opportunity. I just wanted to discuss what no one talks about. I also know I am not alone on this.

Just remember, if you want to do this program, it's okay to be scared. It's okay to cry. But it's okay to be happy about saying goodbye as well. Because in 20 day's, I'll be saying a lot more Hellos!

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